When is it time to stop looking in the rear view?
A therapeutic piece on leaving the past in the past and the future in the future.
One of the most difficult concepts for a human to grasp is the present. It is a foreign concept to both the overthinkers and the relaxed of the world. For as long as I can remember, I’ve never truly understood what it means to sit at ease in the current. We are constantly stewing over our past, and how we’ve gotten to the point we’re at. Likewise, we are in a state of both curiosity and fear for what is to come. The most difficult part about this is that the time that we spend with our heads buried in the sand so swiftly becomes the past that we’ve spent so much time trying to grasp. The same goes for fretting about the future. Ambition is a blessing and a curse, and it comes with lots of moments spent planning and plotting. If you worry only about the end goal, everything in between will simply evaporate. The journey that you’ve so strategically mapped out will be forgettable once you’ve reached your goals. You’ll soon become old and frail and regret those formative years that you spent with your head down, drilling in a mine that you were once told had gold. I preach, as I’ve always preached, as I’ll continue to preach, that the most valuable time is now. Don’t get me wrong, dwelling on things like childhood and adulthood and even old age can be incredibly nutritional. It’s principal that we carry with us all that has happened and all we plan to do. However, stress is out in 2025. It gives you wrinkles. And, the only person that can really put an end to your uneasiness about all things past and future is you. I am no expert on putting my worries aside, in fact it will likely take me all of my adult life to master the art of compartmentalizing. I often find that my mind has wandered, without my consent, into the land of anticipatory anxiety and cannot seem to discover a way out. When confronted with such burden, I find it easy to fall down a rabbit hole of will I/won’t I. Will I succeed in life? Will I be happy? Will things work out exactly as the version of me right now wants them to? The difficulty with these questions lies in the fact that the answers are simply unattainable. They are hypothetical and open-ended and will never leave me feeling any more satisfied. I truly believe that the only way to avoid obsessing over unanswered questions is to give yourself the answer you so badly want to hear. Will I succeed in life? Yes. See? Feeling much better already. Make yourself a bed so comforting and reassuring that you have no problem lying in it. Leave worry out of the picture, no matter how delusional you have to become. Delusion doesn’t have to be this monster that looms over everything real, and clouds your otherwise clear judgement. It can be a soft blanket to cast over yourself, leaving your mind ever so clear and ready to focus on the now. Anyways, this is a concept foreign to many, including myself. It will take me a long time to master de-stressing and being present in everything I do. I hope this piece finds you in a time of worry, and helps you, even a little, to pull yourself out of it.
I love love love you!!